If you have decided on adoption for you and your child, your first question will probably be: who is going to adopt my baby?
Fortunately, there are many parents looking to adopt a newborn baby, and with the right help, you can find the perfect parents.
Here, you can find all the information you need on how to find adoptive parents through an adoption agency or on your own, as well as some guidelines for what to look for in a family.
Find Adoptive Parents with an Agency
Many women who consider adoption have no idea where to find couples who want to adopt a baby. If this describes you, then you have plenty of options to help you, including professional adoption agencies.
An adoption agency is a comprehensive adoption service provider that works with both adoptive families and potential birth mothers to complete adoptions. If you choose to work with an adoption agency, you can expect the following benefits in your search for the right family:
- Guidance and counseling – Adoption specialists are trained and experienced in helping women just like you. Your specialist will be able to walk you through the entire process and provide input if you need it.
- Pre-screened families – All of the families that work with an adoption agency have been screened by that agency and completed a home study, which means that they have been deemed as fit to raise a child.
- Adoptive family profiles – When you decide to work with an agency, your adoption specialist will show you print or video profiles that will help you get to know the families waiting to adopt.
- Help with contacting a family – Once you have selected a family, your adoption specialist will be there to guide you through the first stages of getting to know them. If you want your adoption to be more closed, your specialist can also help exchange information between you and the family.
Adoption agencies can be very convenient and advantageous for women in your position, but this does not mean that every woman works with an agency. Sometimes, a pregnant mother may pursue what is called an independent adoption.
Find Adoptive Parents on your Own
If you place your baby for adoption without the help of an agency, it is known as an independent adoption. When women choose to pursue independent adoptions, it is often because they already know the family they would like to raise their child, and they do not need an agency’s matching services. If you are choosing an independent adoption for another reason and you still need to find families who want to adopt, some of your options include:
- Adoption facilitators – Adoption facilitators are adoption professionals that exist specifically to help bring adoptive families and prospective birth parents together. Unlike adoption agencies, they do not provide any other services.
- Attorney referrals – You will need an attorney to help you legally finalize your adoption. Sometimes, attorneys may be able to help you in your search for a family, but this is not guaranteed.
- Online profiles or newspaper ads – While adoption agencies work with families to create profiles, other families make profiles on their own and post them to the web or in a newspaper. Adoption advertising laws vary from state to state, so this may or may not be an option for you.
- Personal or community networking – One of the most common reasons for a woman in your position to choose independent adoption is because she already knows the family she wants to raise her baby. You or someone you know may know a family right in your area that is looking to adopt a child.
Whatever way you choose to find a family, it is important to remember that the parents you choose must complete a home study, and you must always have a lawyer to legally finalize your adoption. As long as you meet those two requirements, the way you select a family and pursue an adoption plan depends on your situation and needs.
Find the Family for You
You know your options for finding an adoptive family, but how do you know when you’ve found the right family? As your baby’s mother, it’s up to you to decide exactly the kind of life you want for your child. Whatever you want or whatever is important to you, you can make it happen.
You should begin thinking about the kind of family you would like to find for your baby, and there are many different factors and characteristics to consider.
Considerations when Looking for Families
As you begin your search for a family, here are just a few of the qualities you may want to keep in mind:
- Home environment – Do you want your child to live in the city, the suburbs, or the country? Should he or she grow up in a two-parent household? Will there be pets?
- Community – It may be important to you that your child lives near a good school district or a particular church community. You may also want your child to live in a town or neighborhood with a lot of other children.
- Previous adopted or biological children – Some women like the idea of knowing that their child will have siblings, while others would prefer that their baby be an only child.
- Personal values and beliefs – Religious and personal beliefs are important to many women, and they want to be sure that their child is raised with the values they hold.
- Hobbies and lifestyle – If there are particular activities that you would like your child to grow up around, you can find a family that matches your wishes.
Interview Questions to Ask an Adoptive Parent
The questions you could ask an adoptive family are innumerable, but here are just a few ideas of interview questions to get you started:
- How did you and your spouse meet?
- What made you decide you wanted to adopt?
- Do you have any experience with adoption?
- Do you go to church or practice any religion?
- What does a typical day look like in your house? What about the weekends?
- Will there be a parent that stays home with the baby? If not, what are your plans for childcare during the day?
- How much contact with me are you open to?
- How are you going to talk about adoption in your house?
However you choose to find a family for your baby, remember that you are the sole decision-maker, and your options are expansive. Finding the right adoptive family is crucial to having a positive adoption experience, and whatever kind of life you imagine for your baby, you can make it happen.